Coping with a Child’s Medical Emergency: Part II

In our last post, we shared some tips that we hope you'll never need in dealing with a child’s medical emergency. I explained that I had been through my share of medical emergencies with both of my children, including a very scary set of fever-related seizures that my son had as a toddler. In this post, we’ll talk about what you might experience during and after the emergency room visit and share some tips to help you feel a bit more prepared.

1. Be patient.
Typically, when you come into the emergency room with a baby or a young child, you won’t have to wait very long before you are seen by a doctor. However, once the initial assessment is made, you may have to wait quite awhile before the doctor has enough information to determine the best treatment plan, especially if he or she needs to wait for test results.

2. Be ready to tell your story several times.
If the cause of your child’s medical emergency is not obvious, you may need to speak with several doctors, nurses, and technicians. You may find yourself repeatedly describing what you know about your child’s situation. While this may seem inefficient, getting information first hand is best. If staff members don’t seem friendly or understanding while they are asking you questions, keep in mind that they are doing everything they can to help your child as quickly as possible.

3. Make sure you have all the follow-up information and instructions with you when you leave the hospital.
Before you leave the hospital, you will be given a sheet of instructions, prescriptions, and any other information that you need until you see your baby's doctor for follow-up. Put these papers in an obvious and safe place so that you are sure to 1) keep them with you and 2) know where they are when you get home. With all the stress and excitement, it is very easy to lose track of important papers that you are given in the hospital.

4. Recognize that both you and your child will need time to recover.
Nearly all parents will find themselves emotionally spent after a child’s medical emergency. The adrenaline that kept you going will drain away, leaving you feeling exhausted, confused, and a little sick. If you haven’t already reached out for some help, you’ll want to do that for the first few hours (or even days) after you come home. You might find it hard to fall asleep but you should rest if you can, if only by sitting quietly. Though not all families will experience after-effects of a medical emergency, it is important to watch for any long-term changes in your child’s moods or behavior and discuss them with your child’s doctor. You also might find some changes in your own feelings and behavior and it is important that you share any lasting anxiety or concerns you might have with your own doctor.

As we wrap up this short series, let me say again that I hope that none of you will ever find yourself in an emergency room with your child. If you do, remember that you’ll need to stay focused, cooperative, patient, and aware of your child’s needs as you move through the worst moments. Once you get home, recognize that there might be emotional as well as physical effects of your ordeal as you work to put the emergency behind you. Watch for signs that anyone in your family is having a hard time coping with what happened and make sure they get the help they need.

Next time: Dealing with a baby who hates being drowsy.

Coping with a Child’s Medical Emergency: Part I

As a parent, I’ve spent my share of hours in the emergency room. Between my two children, I’ve taken about a dozen trips to the ER, two in an ambulance. Some examples: in high school, my son suffered a broken jaw and facial injuries when he was hit in the face with a baseball during practice and in elementary school, my daughter slammed a car door on her own thumb. Medical emergencies are traumatic for everyone, especially when they involve young children who are not yet able to communicate well or fully understand what is going on around them.

When my son was a toddler, he suffered a series of fever-related seizures starting at 17 months and ending when he was about 3. Most children never have seizures despite high fevers; my son had 6 in 18 months. While his situation was never life-threatening, my husband and I faced some terrifying moments as my daughter, who was six at the time, looked on. My experience with my son’s seizures taught me some important lessons about coping with children’s medical emergencies. In this short series of posts, I’d like to share some important tips that I hope you never use.

Since you are using the internet to read this blog, you know that there are many websites that can help you decide whether or not a situation is a medical emergency. We won’t focus on preventing or identifying emergencies; instead, we’ll discuss coping strategies if one does occur. First, we’ll offer 5 tips to help you be better prepared both before and during the first minutes of a medical emergency. Next time, we’ll talk about how to deal with the emergency room experience and the repercussions that may arise after the emergency is over.

1. Be prepared.

Even though you can never be fully prepared for a medical emergency, here are some important steps you can take.
. Keep essential information (emergency phone numbers, your doctors’ contact information, significant allergies, insurance information, and descriptions of any prescription medications) with you at all times.
· Take a class in infant/child CPR and first aid. Even if you never use any of the skills you learn, taking the class can help you feel less helpless during an emergency. I took the class (the first time) after my son had his first seizure and it helped a great deal. Ideally, you should take the class several times, every year, if you can.
· If you have an ongoing medical issue, like we did, you’ll want to keep a history of events (like medical tests, dates of prior ER visits, and current medications) with you. It is easy to forget important details in a crisis.

2. Stay functional.

There is no point in telling you to “stay calm” because few parents can remain calm while dealing with a child’s emergency. As you might imagine, your emotions will be overwhelming but you should try to do your best to concentrate on getting a complete picture of what is happening, listening carefully to instructions, responding clearly and concisely to questions, and taking any needed action. Your instincts will typically keep you going, though a part of you might feel confused or detached. If you start to panic, remember that your child needs you. Some tips to fight panic: try to consciously relax the muscles in your face, shoulders and neck, slow your breathing, and focus all of your attention on one thing at a time. Tell yourself that you can fall apart later. I can tell you from experience, you will.

3. Make sure that the emergency personnel can find you.

Depending on your emotional state, you may need to ask someone else to call for help or remain nearby to answer questions and provide your location. When you are under extreme pressure, it is not strange to become confused even about places you know well. If you are outside, check to see if your location is easy to spot from the road. If not, look for a landmark that you can describe or a bright colored object you can use to mark your location. If you are inside of a building, send someone outside to meet the emergency personnel.

4. Follow all instructions from emergency personnel.

Medical professionals are trained to collect the information they need and to assist your child very quickly. You may not understand the reasons for their questions or the actions that they take but it is important that you don’t interfere. You can be a vital resource or a massive roadblock for those who are trying to help your child. Do your best to be part of the team.

5. Consider asking someone else to care for your other children.

Whenever possible, you should avoid taking your other children into the emergency room. My daughter has vivid memories of the sights and sounds in the hospital (including blood spurting on a curtain) that could have been avoided. Obviously, you don’t always have time to make an extra call during a crisis but if someone else is caring for your other children (such as friends and family who meet you at the hospital), you’ll be able to focus your attention on the child who is ill.

Next time: Arriving at the emergency room and helping your child (and yourself) deal with the emotions after a medical emergency.